Straight Blazing: ECW Report for 07/09/09

Thwagga Was Thwaded?

Hello ladies and gentlemen welcome back to this edition of Straight Blazin! Im sorry for my absence last week I had to take care of some real life issues and it feels good to be back in the seat! Last weeks ECW was simply awful though so be glad you didn’t have to read the results for it! Heres hoping this weeks will be a little better at least. So lets not skip anything and get right into the action!

ECW was airing on Thursday this week and was pre-taped as the WWE was on an overseas tour and still needed to put on a TV product! They kick off the show with Styker and Matthews hyping the main event of the night which will see Koslov v Christian and the winner gets a shot at Tommy Dreamer at Night of Champions in my current residence of Philadelphia PA! Now Ill be giving a report on Night of Champions as well in the near future and it will be a first hand experience type of deal! So be on the look out for that as well.

The first match sees one of the Bella twins take on Katie Lea Burchill who is sporting a Sara Del Rey like face paint and is looking mean! The match itself was pretty pathetic and extremely short. I wish I could stretch this match description out but seriously.. It lasted all of about four minutes or so and the Bellas did their “under ring switcheroo” to pick up the win over Katie Lea and continue to make me hate WWE womens wrestling.

Match Rating:

1/5

Match Review:

Bathroom break this one was..

Before we go to the commercial break we have Stryker and Matthews hyping the 15 man trade and going over who went where. Let me just say they KILLED ECW in this damn trade. Which is the point seeing as it’s a test grounds for the big shows, But we lost Evan Bourne, Jack Thwagga, Mark Henry, Finlay, and The Hart Foundation.. So basically everything that was good with ECW we lost except for Christian. Thanks a lot WWE for this amazing idea -_- But we did gain one of the more underrated wrestlers there is in William Regal and a solid athletic talent in Shelton Benjamin. Goldust and The Bella Twins are just useless but we’ll take it!

Also they show a clip of last weeks show where Shelton Benjamin made his ECW re-debut along with the WWE’s newest Japanese star Yoshi Tatsu! Last week Shelton got on the mic and mocked Yoshi and made fun of his heritage several times causing the crowd to actually get behind him and laugh at him and the whole situation. Yoshi kicked Shelton in the head as soon as the match started though and picked up the quick win over Shelton for his first ever WWE victory!

Commercial Break.. In-Deed!

We come back and wouldn’t you know the next match is Shelton Benjamin v Yoshi Tatsu again! This time Shelton is all business and no playing around and the two quickly get off to a good start to the match! It was a pretty decent back and forth match in the beginning with a couple spots here and there but simple basic wrestling was the key. Shelton looked good as always and so did Yoshi which makes me hope that they actually push a Japanese star like Tajiri and not just make them a joke. Like Funaki.. In-DEED!

Commercial Break as Shelton has Yoshi on the ground hurting him

Back from the commercial and Shelton is still in control. The crowd even gets behind Yoshi and chants his name which leads to him getting the momentum and nailing a few key moves like a modified Curb Stomp and a Springboard Roundhouse Kick right to the face which garnered a near count. Shelton and Yoshi then ended up exchanging kicks and strikes and the match was really picking up now! Shelton nailed a capture suplex at one point and it seemed as if he was going to pull it off but he didn’t get the pin. Shelton out of NOWHERE nailed the Pay Dirt in mid-air and picked up the victory in a very nice wrestling contest.

Match Rating:

3/5

Match Review:

A Very good little match that showed that Yoshi can go and that Shelton can STILL go. I hope they give both these guys a good push. This is the kind of wrestling we need on ECW now with the new crop of guys!

Commercial Break after seeing a cool little Koslov training vignette.. Interesting little video and maybe this means Koslov will get that push into a title match? We’ll have to wait and see!

Next up we have.. Wait for it.. The debut of Ezekial Jackson! The first time since the WWE draft back how many months ago. Finally he is ready to make his ECW debut in a squash match against a total jobber! Ezekial looked VERY horrible in this short couple minute squash match. I would probably say it has something to do with ring rust or something I hope. But he looked simply awful. He cut a little promo before the match making a religious reference to his name and how it means Strength, Stryker elaborated on that part as he just said “Only one name means anything, Ezekial”. What a class act..

Match Rating:

1/5

Match Review:

Bring Back Ahmed Johnson!

STAND BACK! Theres a segment coming through! The camera pans to the back and we see a couple stage hands having a random conversation on a pre-taped show.. Epic.. And in the background a lady was on a ladder and she fell off and all of a sudden Hurricane Helms was there to make the save! As she goes to thank the Hurricane he is gone in a flash! Tiffany, The GM, walks back and asks what just happened and what was going on. A producer said “You wouldn’t believe it anyway” and the segment ends. HURRICANE HELMS OWNS!! Awesome to see him back

Up next we have the absolute WORST segment in the history of the wrestling business and something that makes me wanna gouge my eyes out every single time I see it.. It debuted last week to a horrible reaction and was simply just a trashy segment that lasted 15 minutes too long last week. Abraham Washington is back with his show that only one person cares about, Himself. His guest is Tommy Dreamer and heres a little bit of a highlight of the interview since I cant bring myself to put all the boring details.

Abraham Washington called Tommy Dreamer fat about 12 times..

Abraham also said he looked pregnant

Tommy Dreamer mentioned all the greats that came through ECW and how he was proud to be a champ and fight everyone

Abraham Washington asked if Jenny Craig was his favorite opponent

Dreamer called out the fact that Abraham Washingtons hair looks painted on

Abraham Washington denied this and brushed his fake looking hair

Dreamer, when asked, said he'd like to see Christian win the match so he could fight him again and called him the best ECW has

Koslov then interrupted and got in Dreamers face, Abraham Washington said Koslov would win which made the Russian put his hands up in victory.. Not sure why

Well now that thats over.. We have a number one contenders match up to get to! Tommy Dreamer was on the stick for commentary and I thought this match would last longer til I looked at my clock and seen it was about 7:52 when this match began.. Which means it would be less then 10 minutes and anything but spectacular. 

Dreamer was GOLDEN on commentary and played up the fake that Christian got a monstrous applause from the crowd and was really playing that whole "I respect him but Ill beat him" angle. Koslov got his head drove into the steel post by Christian when he went for a turnbuckle move and then Koslov turned around groggy and Christian nailed the KillSwitch to pick up the win as Dreamer praised him some more. Dreamer said he cant wait to return to Philly as ECW Champion and defend it against Christian. The show went off the air with Christian on the ramp celebrating his victory.

Match Rating:

That was a main event?

Match Review:

If you blinked you basically missed this 4 minute match.. Shame they didnt give a good bit of time for the main event. Seriously a shame.

Show Grade: C-

This show lacked alot.. It had one good match, A short main event, a horrible segment returning, and a match that no one cares about and a switcheraoo angle we seen months ago on Smackdown that didnt fly over there. Step your game up ECW.. Dont let the trades ruin the whole show.

Now since I need to make a word count, and its what I live for, Here is my UFC 100 predictions for this weekend! Ill only do the top three instead of the whole card! Its this saturday night at 9pm on Pay Per View. I reccommend everyone order this even if your not a huge MMA fan because this is sure to be a hell of a card and an event.

Frank Mir defeats Brock Lesnar via Submission in Round 2

Why? Simply put Frank Mir might be the smartest fighter in MMA right now.. I will give Brock the fact that he is a monster that the UFC hasnt seen in a LONG time.. And his strength and wrestling are top notch, But look at the last fight? Frank Mir waited for his advantage and took it. Now Lesnar should have won if the ref didnt cheaply stop the match and deduct a point when only a verbal warning was necessary.. But still.. I think Mir underestimated Lesnar and he wont do it again.. This will NOT last 5 rounds IMO and it will be a hell of a beatdown in the first round. Lots of Lesnar striking and Mir trying to take down.. But look for Mir to capatalize on a mistake again or just use his brilliant BJJ to wear Lesnar down to the point where he can lock a submission on. Im rooting for Brock but my money is on Frank Mir!

George "Rush" St Pierres defeats Thiago Alves via TKO in Round 3

GSP is the most dominant force in MMA right now besides Fedor, And Alves, while tough, Doesnt stand a chance against him IMO. He is technically sound and is a brilliant fighter who wont be pummelled by Alves like Hughes was. Good match im hoping though! Alves might not even make weight which is another thing to be concerned about, He is dropping 30 lbs for this fight so who knows if he even will make the weight for the fight. Either way I believe GSP will outlast Alves and retain his title

Michael Bisping defeats Dan Henderson via KO in Round 2

Bisping will back up his claims and be the first person to knock out Hendo.. While I dont underestimate Dan Henderson at all I think Michael Bisping is cocky for a reason. He is a monster in the octagon and has proven time and time again that he can go toe to toe with some of the best. Dan Henderson is arguably one of the best but I just think we will see Bisping pull this one out. He talks a big game and I hope to see him back it up and KO Hendo!

Join us next week for another edition of Straight Blazin! Remember to STAY BLAZIN!!

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