King Says John Cena Is Superman, Smarks Riot..

Holy halibet! Back like that annoying rash on your bum that just wont go away.. Its Straight Blazin! Now its time to ditch that show ECW which made me want to kick an infant in the face, and move on with Monday Night Raw! The guest host bug has been continuing and for the most part has been a success for the WWE. So without further ado.. Lets get on with Raw!

Show starts out with Chris Jericho addressing the fans about Bragging Rights. He explains the concept is Raw v Smackdown and says that the main event will be the best of Raw versus the best of Smackdown. Chris Jericho promotes Smackdown and says he has been named the team captain to Team Smackdown. While he is talking Nancy O Dell, wearing a Peyton Manning Jersey(CHEAP), says that Raw don’t start with him.. It starts with Degeneration X…

Out comes DX while Jericho sneers at Nancy O Dell. HHH is the only one who is out to the ring actually and instead of HBK handing him the mic as usual he has the new ring announcer do it. It was slightly amusing since the ring announcer was balding and small and overweight. HHH explains that HBK isn’t there and hes bummed because they were supposed to head up Team Raw and take down Team Smackdown. HHH says he wont take that from Shawn and hes gonna call him on live TV and see how hes doing and to badger him and he gets the voicemail which is shawn singing his theme music telling people to leave a message and stuff. Quite funny.  After getting off the phone out comes Jeri-Show!


HHH tries to get Jericho to hold the DX book and smile for the camera and he throws it down as the crowd reigns boos down.  HHH puts over Smackdown but says that Raw is way better and lists off the amount of time its been on and all their achievements. HHH points out that Jericho is the boss and calls the shots.. Then he says that Jericho is the pitcher and Show is the catcher.. And I lol at that.. Now Show says that he carries the team and him and Jericho exchange some glances and some words of argument with one another. Show says how Barker punked out Jericho.. Jericho says about Mayweather and Shaq punking out Show.. Big Show then agrees to be on Team Raw at Bragging Rights.. Too bad there is no spots open says HHH.. But he can earn his spot tonight if he wins his match against Chris Jericho! And that match is next!

Commercial Break time..

Chris Jericho v The Big Show. If Big Show wins hes on Team Raw

OBVIOUS size advantage in this match but Jericho is one of the best in the world at what he does, yes he says that and yes its true. A couple tests of strength that Big Show comes out on top of. Jericho ends up frustrated and Show just wants him to shake his hand midway through the match and he pisses Big Show off after smacking him in the face a few times and he gets thrown into the corner by the throat for it. Jericho then goes for the code breaker on him. Show puts Jericho on the top rope and tells him to calm down like a little kid and Jericho slaps him and Big Show KO punches him off the top ropes. He falls to the outside “hurt” but as Show is checking on him the count hits 8 for a countout and Jericho tries to run into the ring, Show catches him and pulls him out and slides in beating the count and winning the match. Big Show is on Team Raw with DX..

Match Rating:

1/5

Maria Menounous is in the back and she is interviewing Legacy. They are confident that they will both be on Team Raw and Maria says that isn’t happening. She explains that they are qualifying in a triple threat match to decide a Team Raw spot. They ask who the third guy is, and she says John Cena as the crowd pops and we cut to another commercial.

Commercial Break

Divas Championship: Mickie James v Lillian

This match is so entertaining.. I cant believe how awesome this match is. A couple of frail looking clotheslines.. A few irish whips.. Jillian slams Mickie to the mat hard off of the turnbuckle and props her legs on the top rope.. And wait.. Jillian… Wins… The.. Title.. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

Match Rating:

1/5..

Epic rating 5/5

That is so epic.. She makes a speech and says she wants to sing her new favorite song by Lady Gaga.. She begins to sing horribly of course but Jillian is the new Divas Champion apparently.. But wait.. Out comes Nancy O Dell and it looks like this wont last.. That’s a shame because Mickie James needed knocked down a peg.. She says that she made a diva trade.. And Jillian has to defend her title against the newest aqquisition.. And out comes MELINA!!!

Melina v Newly Crowned Divas Champ Jillian

This match wont take long.. Melina on the explosive offense and nails her Amazing Redish finishing move and picks up the victory becoming the New Divas Champion..

Match Rating:

1/5

Meh.. The fact its off of Mickie James is awesome.. But that was a cluster..


Commercial Break! Ever wonder what happens on Smackdown? Well have no fear.. Madam Snapshot is here! Check out Madam Snapshots review of Smackdown every week for some informative and funny stuff! it’s a must read!

Next weeks Raw host is revealed.. SNOOP D O DOUBLE G!! Awesome..

HHH is shown talking to Shawn on the phone and directing it towards a standup HBK cutout. Hornswoggle comes in dressed as HBK as his music hits.. Shawn says hes gonna go into the living room to see the TV to see whats going on. HHH tells Horny that its gimmick infringement.. HBK starts spazzing on the phone and Horny super kicks the HBK standup and the segment gets funny for once as HHH tackles the midget to the ground.. Wow..

Santino segment with Nancy O Dell and Maria M.. I don’t feel like spouting out that last name.. Beth Phoenix comes storming in and apparently it seems she has been traded to Smackdown.. BOO! And she demands to be traded back to Raw or that she is gonna make them regret their decision and she then grabs Maria and slams her against the wall and gets in her face and threatens her some more. Santino nominates Maria M to fight Beth and then tells Beth he faked every “organism” in their relationship.. *facepalm*

Cena/Orton promo package. By the way.. Ironman match FOR THE ULTIMATE WIN!

Commercial Break! Got nothing this time..

Ted Dibiase v Cody Rhodes v John Cena.. Winner gets Team Raw Spot

Logical thinking says John Cena WONT win since he has his Ironman match.. But we will see how it goes.. He gets a huge pop from the crowd, which is generally surprising, and the match kicks off hot as Legacy stalks John Cena from either side and Cena lunges at Rhodes taking him down and then countes Dibiase’s attack. The match evens itself out after that.. Expect many pinfall arguments from Legacy and other such things.


Back from the commercial break and Cena mounted some offense during the commercial break but Legacy is back in control and still working together as a team. Dibiase gets thrown to the outside and Cody tries to capitalize and win the match but cant do it on several attempts.  Cena gets a close call before Dibiase saves the match and breaks the count! Cena reverses a double suplex into his own.. Nice.. And takes Rhodes out of the ring and wails on Dibiase some. Cena locks the STF on and out comes Orton to distract Cena without touching him Rhodes rolls up Dibiase as the ref was distracted and wins the spot on Team Raw.. As the two almost go to blows Randy Orton gets in the middle of the two and Cena smirks from the ramp.

Nancy O Dell comes on the titantron and makes the main event of Legacy v Randy Orton and John Cena.. Ha.. That’s a pretty fail main event and wasn’t too “shocking” but we’ll roll with it!

Commercial Break


Team Raw Qualifying Match: Jack Swagga v MVP

These two have had some good matches lately so this should be no different and be a good match right up until the Main event.. Barring a segment in between of course.. And that wonderful Beth v Maria M matchup. Eww.. The match was a very solid contest out of both men.. It was a little shorter then it could have been but Jack Swagga picks up the victory via a Gutwrench Powerbomb and is a part of Team Raw..

Match Rating:

2/5

Legacy segment that shows the two at arms with one another.. And Randy Orton trying to play peace keeper.. Up next ANOTHER Bragging Rights Qualifier..

Team Raw Qualifying Match: Kofi Kingston v Evan Bourne

Two top face superstars of Raw going one on one to see who can make it for Team Raw! Two high flying superstars made for a few good spots in this match as Evan had quite a few good counters and so did Kofi.. Kofi nails the Trouble In Paradise to qualify for Team Raw!

Match Rating:

2/5

After another commercial break and a stupid segment from HHH and Hornswoggle.. AGAIN.. We have the 6 diva matchup, which I misheard as a singles match, featuring Gail Kim, Kelly Kelly and Maria M v Beth Phoenix, Eva Mendez and Alicia Fox.. The match itself was pretty average and Maria M got A LOT more ring time then I thought she would.. It did the filler job of a few minutes it needed to.. But nothing short of crappy IMO.. Kelly Kelly picks up the pinfall in the match…

Commercial Break.. Main Event next

They show Miz winning the United States Title last week..  EPIC WIN!! The Miz is a solid talent and the future of this company. He is out to the ring to cut a promo and I am sure it will be.. Wait for it.. AWESOME!

Miz talks about his match with John Morrison.. He tears him down and calls him the “New Richard Simmons” and says hes all hair and abs.. A very short and straight to the point promo which Miz delivered wonderfully to hype a match some people hadn’t even known about. That match will DELIVER!

A match made for next weeks show will be confirmed after the main event match that is kicking off now!

Legacy v Randy Orton/John Cena

The match is of course a Cena beat down as Orton has no support for Cena and lets him be man handled by Legacy for the whole match. Same stuff we seen before really with a few less tag team moves and more groundwork from Legacy.. Orton gets tagged in by a stumbling Cena and now Orton has to face off against Rhodes who doesn’t back down. Dibiase comes in and gets a few close counts and Orton tags back in Cena! Cena starts rolling on Dibiase nailing all the trademarks. Orton tags Cena when he hit’s the 5 knuckle shuffle. Cena goes for the AA and Orton attacks Cena after tagging himself in, As he is attacking Cena, Ted Dibiase rolls up Orton like Rhodes did to him earlier in the night!

Match Rating:

 2.5/5

Show Rating:

C

Cena hit’s the AA on Orton to end the show.. What an ending.. Splitting Legacy in pieces.. Cena has the upper hand.. What will happen? Join me next week where on John Cenas POSSIBLE last night on Raw he faces Triple H! Stay Blazin!